Justifications for Not Doing the Dishes

A Guide to Procrastination and Culinary Neglect

It's not like they're going anywhere.

I'm a visionary, not a drudge.

There's a sink full of soap suds that's just begging to be ignored.

I'm on a deadline to watch cat videos.

It's not like the dishwasher is going to do it for me.

My hands are allergic to water.

I have a PhD in Doing Other Things.