Technique 3: The Pretentious Posturing

You've reached the pinnacle of pretentiousness. Congratulations!

This is the technique where you pretend to be more cultured than everyone else, while secretly listening to the same Top 40 radio station you've had on your phone's home screen since 2018.

Here's a few tips to take your pretentiousness to the next level:

• Use only artisanal, small-batch, hand-pressed coffee beans in your pour-over.
• Only consume organic, grass-fed, gluten-free, vegan, free-range chicken at the trendy new bistro downtown.
• Cite at least three obscure French philosophers in every casual conversation.

But don't just take our word for it! Visit our Pretentious Poseur page for more tips and tricks.

Or, if you're feeling really adventurous, check out our Pretentious Accordian page for some seriously pretentious music recommendations.