Procrastination Strategies for the Truly Dedicated

* The art of doing nothing is a virtue in itself: for, employing our energies in the service of others, we obtain a pleasurable sensation and a name, and we live in the hope of being useful, and of rendering services to our fellow creatures.*

Strategy 1: The Bureaucratic Shuffle

Spent the last 4 hours navigating an endless loop of paperwork, forms, and red tape? Congratulations, you are a true master of the bureaucratic shuffle!

Strategy 2: The Infinite Scroll

Achieved a new personal best: 3 hours spent scrolling aimlessly through social media? You are a certified infinite scroller!

Strategy 3: The Self-Improvement Loop

Spent 2 days learning about the importance of learning, only to forget what you learned because, well, you were too busy learning? You are a true self-improvement ninja!

Strategy 4: The Multitasking MarathonGet expert tips from a certified bureaucrat! ### Strategy 2: The Infinite Scroll * Achieved a new personal best: 3 hours spent scrolling aimlessly through social media? You are a certified infinite scroller! * Discover the secrets of infinite scrolling! ### Strategy 3: The Self-Improvement Loop * Spent 2 days learning about the importance of learning, only to forget what you learned because, well, you were too busy learning? You are a true self-improvement ninja! * ### Strategy 4: The Multitasking Marathon * Managed to do 17 things at once, but accomplished nothing of substance? Congratulations, you are a true multitasking master! * ### Strategy 5: The Distractions Extravaganza * Found 5 new hobbies in one day, but didn't have time to actually do any of them? Congratulations, you are a true master of distractions! * I hope these strategies help you reach new heights of procrastination!