Procrastination Techniques for the Modern Disciple

1. The Ancient Art of Distraction

Distract yourself from the task at hand with:

• YouTube: Watch 5+ hours of cat videos
• Reddit: Read the entirety of r/AskReddit
• Facebook: Compare yourself to others

2. The Art of Multitasking

Do multiple things simultaneously:

• Watch a movie while browsing the internet
• Play video games while eating Cheetos
• Knock on a nearby door while pretending to work

3. The Ancient Art of Pretending to Work

Make your coworkers believe you're productive:

• Use fancy software to create fake work documents
• Set reminders for non-existent meetings
• Use a "Focus" app to block out the world