Escape Plan Phase 3, Option 3: The Desperate Measures Protocol

In a desperate bid to escape the clutches of our dastardly captors, we've devised a plan of last resort.

The protocol involves:

• Donning a disguise of pure white, complete with a pair of Groucho Marx-esque fake eyebrows.
• Executing a daring heist for a getaway car, a 1969 Pontiac GTO.
• Crashing the local diner for a hasty breakfast, complete with a plate of pancakes and a side of hashbrowns.

But don't just take our word for it, read the full plan for yourself.

View our extensive list of emergency contact numbers in case things go south.

Or, if you're feeling particularly reckless, head to the rooftop for a thrilling game of "dodge the spotlights".