Exceptional Excuses

I was not lazy, I was just conserving energy for more important things... like binge-watching Netflix!

Like, I was not late, I was just running at a different speed than everyone else. You know, like, time dilation or something.

I didn't do my homework because I was on a secret research mission for a very important project. (Shh, it's top-secret.)

I was not ignoring you, I was just selectively listening to the sounds of silence.