Ah, the age-old question that haunts many a sleepy soul. It's as if the powers that be have declared that the weekends are a mere illusion, a cruel joke played on us mere mortals. Newsflash: THEY'RE NOT LAUGHING AT YOU, THEY'RE LAUGHING WITH YOU, INTO THE VOID OF EXISTENCE WHERE SLEEP IS BUT A DISTANT MEMORY
Or is it? Could it be that the government is secretly funding some sort of nefarious sleep deprivation program, using advanced mind control tech to keep you up all weekend, binge-watching Netflix, wondering where it all went wrong?