You: "Dear Dr. Expert, I'm tired of surviving in a world overrun by mutated zombies and roving gangs of marauders. Will I ever find true love in this desolate wasteland?"
Dr. Expert: "Ah, the age-old question. Well, my dear, I'd say the odds are slim, but not impossible. In fact, I'd recommend you try online dating. Just make sure you have a reliable Wi-Fi connection and a good signal-to-noise ratio."
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Dr. Expert's Expertise Level: 9/10 (only because she's still working on her apocalypse survival skills)
Dr. Expert's Availability: Monday to Friday, 9 AM to 5 PM (EST), except during zombie outbreaks.