Good morrow, fellow felines! Today's forecast is looking purr-optimistic, with catnip futures up 5.2% and tuna reserves expected to break a record 7.4 metric tons.
However, be warned: global cat hair loss is projected to increase by 3.1% due to the impending arrival of yet another lint roller.
We recommend investing in cat toys and scratching posts to ride out this market fluctuation.
For a more detailed analysis, visit Whisker Indices or our Catnip Speculation page.
Whisker Indices Catnip Speculation