Get ready to have your deepest thoughts exposed. Literally.
Our highly advanced (in theory) team of mind-readers will use our patented (in fantasy) technology to tap into your subconscious, uncovering the secrets of your thoughts, desires, and deepest fears.
We'll use a combination of advanced (totally not real) neuroimaging techniques, along with a pinch of good old-fashioned guesswork, to get into your head.
Absalom P. Brainreader (Founder & Chief Mind-Reader): The mastermind behind our operation. Has a Ph.D. in Made-up Sciences and a talent for getting into your head.
Dr. Emily M. Thinktank (Senior Mind-Reader): Our resident expert on all things thought-provoking. Has a Ph.D. in Real-World Psychology (we think).
Don't be afraid to reach out to us for your individual consultation needs. We promise not to judge you (too harshly).
Request a consultation | Group consultations (because who doesn't love a good group hug?)