Our Mind-Reading Services

We offer the most basic of mind-reading services. Our team of highly trained, slightly-competent consultants will attempt to read your thoughts.

For a low, low price of $50,000, we'll try to figure out what you're thinking. Results not guaranteed, but our team's not lazy.

Standard Package Includes:

• A 30-minute session of staring intensely at your face
• A 10-minute session of asking leading questions
• A complimentary copy of "The Art of Mind-Reading for Dummies"