Welcome, traders, to the trading floor of the Apocalypse. Here, the rules are simple: buy, sell, and pray.

The market is a jungle, and you're a key player. But don't say we didn't warn you. The trading floor is a place where fortunes are made and lost in the blink of an eye.

We have a special offer for you: invest in our exclusive line of Apocalypse-Proof Bonds. Guaranteed to double in value... or your money back, plus interest.