Where the rich get richer and the poor get poorer, but at least they get a nice shade of bling.
Welcome to the most exclusive, most extravagant, most utterly absurd bank in the land! We offer services so luxurious, so decadent, so over-the-top, that you'll never want for anything again... except perhaps a second mortgage.
Our services include:
Don't wait any longer! Apply now and join the ranks of the truly blinged!
Or, if you're feeling adventurous, try our Ivory-Bingle Roulette for a chance to win big... or lose everything.