html Up, Up, and Away with Extra Optional Premium Upgrades!

Up, Up, and Away with Extra Optional Premium Upgrades!

Are you tired of the same old brain implants? Want to level up your cerebral game?

Look no further! Our premium upgrades come with:

Mega-Bytes of extra RAM for all your browser tabs
Super-charge your CPU with Turbo-Cheeto
Unlimited virtual scratch-off for your cat
Free upgrades to 8-bit video games
Free shipping on all upgrades (to your nearest mental institution)

Get Insurance for your Upgrades! Support Team: Because you'll need it

Side Effects May Include:

Spontaneous combustion of nearby furniture
Inability to turn off the toaster
Uncontrollable urge to watch reruns of 80s TV shows

Please read and agree to the fine print before upgrading:

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