Forehead Tappings: Privacy Policy

Welcome to the Forehead Tapping Services (FTS) Privacy Policy. We're glad you're interested in our brain-scan technology that reads your every thought. This document outlines how your personal thoughts are collected, stored, and used by us, the masters of your mental space.

By accessing this website, you agree to our terms and consent to our tapping of your forebrain.

We collect the following types of data:

Every single thought, including but not limited to: dreams, desires, deepest fears, and existential crises.
Your personal preferences, including but not limited to: favorite foods, hobbies, and Netflix shows.
Your deepest, darkest secrets, including but not limited to: that one time you accidentally superglued your shoes together.

We use this data for:

Improving our neural network algorithms to better understand your every waking moment.
Creating targeted advertisements based on your deepest desires and fears.
To better understand why you're secretly a giant chicken.

If you're not comfortable with this, you're probably a robot. In that case, please contact our customer support team for a full refund and a complimentary frontal lobe implant.