Automatic Pant Buyer Beware

Caution: This is not a real store. Do not send us money.

We're not actually selling pants. But we'll pretend we are. Because, why not?

Our pants are the best, but only in our dreams. They're made from a special material that's 99% pure fantasy. 1% is just plain magic.

Learn more about our pants What are our pants made from? Our pants are not real Why are we still here? What happens if you buy our pants? Our pants are made from the future Why did we start this store Our pants are made from the mind of our founder What are our return and refund policies Contact us

Disclaimer: Our pants are not actually for sale. But if you want to send us your money, we'll accept it. We just might send you a pair of pants that don't really fit.

Automatic Pant Buyer Beware, Inc.