Galactic Safety Briefing

Subpage 3: Alien Life Form Identification and Containment Procedures

Warning: The following information is classified TOP-SECRET. Do not attempt to share with any unauthorized parties, including but not limited to: your sister, your cat, or that one weird cousin at the family reunion.

In the event of an alien encounter, follow these steps:

  1. Do not attempt to communicate with the alien using your best "Galactic Diplomacy 101" skills. Trust us, it's not going to end well.
  2. Use the approved Alien Containment Device (ACD) to safely isolate the extraterrestrial visitor.
  3. Call in a team of highly trained and highly armed Galactic Safety Specialists (GSS) to extract and transport the alien to a secure facility for further study.
  4. Do not under any circumstances attempt to offer the alien a cup of coffee or a ride to the nearest space station. This will be considered a critical breach of protocol and will result in your immediate demotion to "janitorial duties."

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