Skyscraper Conquest Guidelines

Because you know you're going to need them.

Conquering skyscrapers is a delicate art. You need to know the rules, or you'll end up like the guy who tried to climb the Eiffel Tower using only a really strong leg and a can of spray cheese.

Rule 1: Don't Get Caught

Make sure you're not wearing a neon pink jumpsuit and a "I'm with stupid" t-shirt while attempting to climb the skyscraper.

Stealth Suit Recommendations

Rule 2: Use the Right Gear

You can't just use your bare hands and a prayer to conquer a skyscraper. Get yourself some decent climbing gear, like a harness, some rope, and a grappling hook that doesn't look like it was made by a kindergartener's arts and crafts project.

Climbing Gear Best Practices

Rule 3: Know When to Call It A Day

You're not a superhero, so don't act like it. If it's getting dark, you're tired, or you've just eaten a questionable tuna sandwich, it's time to head back down.

When to Catch the Bus