The Quantum Fluctuation Theory: A Handler's Guide

Also known as QFT, this theory explains why your toaster keeps exploding in the kitchen.

According to QFT, every time you toast bread, a tiny quantum fluctuation occurs, creating a localized probability field.

This field causes the toaster to experience a temporary but intense desire to burst into flames, resulting in a shower of sparks and a burnt offering.

It's not just your toaster, though - QFT applies to all appliances, making your dishwasher a potential time bomb and your blender a hazard.

Don't worry, though - it's just science!

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