Time-Traveling Toaster Report
Executive Summary:
Our research team has been investigating reports of time-traveling toasters for several years. While some have dismissed these claims as absurd, we've managed to gather conclusive evidence that toasters are indeed capable of traversing the space-time continuum.
Our data shows that 9 out of 10 toasters will return to their original time period after being sent to the past. The 1 out of 10 that don't return are often found stuck in the Middle Ages, where they're hunted by knights for being "doubtlessly anachronistic".
We're not entirely sure what causes these temporal anomalies, but our research suggests it may be linked to the toaster's fondness for 1980s pop culture.
prophets-of-doubt.pngWARNING: Time-Traveling Toasters are known to cause:
- Temporal paradoxes resulting in toast that is simultaneously toasted and untoasted.
- Cosmic radiation poisoning from the toaster's nuclear-powered heating elements.
- Uncontrollable urges to sing show tunes.
For more information, visit our Prophets of Doubt subpage, where we delve deeper into the mysteries of these time-traveling appliances.