Illogical Pseudoprophesies

Welcome, fellow illogician, to a collection of utterly absurd and completely made-up pseudo-prophesies that defy explanation and logic.

Random Pseudopropheis:

The great and powerful Pseudopropheius of Cheese will soon bring about the downfall of all that is good and holy.

It is foretold that the Pseudopropheius of Cheese will be accompanied by a side of fries and a diet Coke.