Welcome to 12-Resorts, where the pool's broken, the bartender's a jerk, and the buffet's a mystery meat buffet.
This is Option 4: "The One with the Broken Jacuzzi". The in-room hot tub has been out-of-order since '09, but the complimentary continental breakfast has been free since '07!
Management's Response: "We're Working On It"
Our Legal Team is on It, Too (But Not Really)