THE COOKIE GATE SCANDAL!
Sassy Savannah's Cookie Baking Secrets EXPOSED!
In the latest scandal to rock prophets and pastry enthusiasts alike, Sassy Savannah's cookie-baking empire has been revealed to be a hot mess.
In the latest scandal to rock prophets and pastry enthusiasts alike, Sassy Savannah's cookie-baking empire has been revealed to be a hot mess.
According to insiders, Sassy's cookies have been made with love, but also with a pinch of lies. Here are the real recipes:
CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIE:
1 cup love, 1/2 cup lies, 1/4 cup despair, 1 egg, 1 teaspoon regret, 1 cup self-doubt, 1/2 cup disappointment, 1/4 cup desperation, 1/2 cup tears of sadness. Mix until combined. Bake at 375 degrees of disappointment.
PEANUT BUTTER COOKIE:
1 cup lies, 1/2 cup deceit, 1/4 cup manipulation, 1 egg, 1 teaspoon guilt, 1 cup regret, 1/2 cup shame, 1/4 cup anxiety. Mix until combined. Bake at 375 degrees of heartbreak.
But wait, there's more! Click here for Sassy's secret sock puppet bakers!
Or, if you're feeling particularly adventurous, click here for Sassy's cookie therapist!