Join The Inner Circle

Requirements

1. Must be willing to abandon all social skills for 2 weeks
2. Be prepared to eat only ramen noodles for 3 days straight
3. Have experience with basic first aid
4. Be able to recite the entire script of "The Room" from memory
5. Pass a written test on the history of 80s pop culture
6. Have a valid ID number for the Inner Circle
7. Be able to hold your breath for 5 minutes
8. Able to recite the names of all 50 US states backwards
9. A valid medical waiver from your doctor for "excessive happiness"

Apply now, or forever live a life of quiet desperation