Q: What are breakroom brawls?
A: Breakroom brawls are unsanctioned fistfights between coworkers in the breakroom. They're like a real-life game of "Rock, Paper, Scissors" but with more swearing and less scissors.
Q: Why is this happening in my breakroom?
A: It's because your coworkers are secretly all trying out for Survivor but in reality.
Q: How can I avoid a breakroom brawl?
A: Try wearing microwave-sized" earplugs or self-defense classes for breakroom dwellers. But honestly, good luck with that.
What happens in a breakroom brawl?
Breakroom Brawl Squads: The Secret Societies Behind the Fights
It's a free-for-all of flailing arms, hair-pulling, and possibly a few strategically-placed stapler-throwing.
But in all seriousness, someone usually gets fired.
Did you know that behind the scenes, there are secret societies controlling the breakroom brawl landscape?
They're known only by their cryptic symbols:
These are the signs of the breakroom brawlers' guilds, each representing a different fighting style: