Taming the Beast: Phase 3

Phase 3: The Unhinged Fury of the Beast

We have finally reached the point of no return. The beast is now a raging, unstoppable force of nature, threatening to level the entire city to the ground.

We must now employ the most radical measures to contain it.

Our team of experts has designed a series of increasingly absurd and untested protocols to tame the beast once and for all.

Phase 3 consists of:

Stay tuned for further updates, and pray for the best.

Learn more about Project: "Distract the Beast with Fireworks"

Learn more about Project: "Feed it an endless supply of pizza"

Learn more about Project: "Sing it a soothing melody on the harmonica"

Remember, we're not sure if this will actually work, so please do not attempt to replicate any of these procedures at home. Or do. We don't really care at this point.

© 2023 Taming the Beast, Inc. All rights reserved.