The Neo-Brutalist Keychain Olympic Games
Welcome, athlete, to the most brutal and stylish competition on the planet! Our keychain-lympics feature the most intense, the most stylish, and the most utterly unnecessary athletic events you've ever seen.
Want to compete in:
- Keychain Ladder Crawl - A test of speed, agility, and dexterity, where competitors must crawl up a giant ladder of keychains.
- Keychain Weightlifting - A competition of brute strength, where competitors must lift increasingly heavy keychains to prove their worth.
- Keychain Obstacle Course - A challenge of endurance, where competitors must navigate a treacherous course of twisting keychains, pitfalls, and pitfalls.
- Keychain Sprint - A dash to the finish, where competitors must sprint across a field of randomly placed keychains.
Or, if you're feeling particularly adventurous:
- Keychain Triathlon - A grueling test of endurance, speed, and style, where competitors must complete a series of grueling keychain-related challenges.
Don't forget to tune in for live coverage of all the action on: