Kitchen Secrets: The Ultimate Guide to Cooking with Utter Incompetence

Welcome, fellow kitchen novices! This guide is for you. Here are some secret ingredients to add to your meals that will make them truly unforgettable.

			
				// Don't try this at home
				// Unless you want to
				// In that case, go for it!
				// Add 1 cup of ketchup to your scrambled eggs
				// And 2 cups of mayonnaise to your pizza
			
		

But wait, there's more! Learn the secret techniques of cooking with utter incompetence.