Welcome to Abusive Parenting 101: The Art of Making Your Kids Hate You

Here you'll learn the techniques of yelling, belittling, and manipulating your children into submission.

Subtopics:

Technique 1: Yell at Your Kids

This technique involves yelling at your kids at the top of your lungs. It's scientifically proven to give them a permanent fear of making eye contact with you.

Advanced Yelling Techniques

Technique 2: Belittle Them

This technique is all about belittling your kids' accomplishments and dreams. It's like a special brand of emotional poison that makes them doubt themselves.

Sadness and Regret

Technique 3: Make Them Play Video Games for 12 Hours Straight

This technique involves forcing your kids to play video games non-stop for 12 hours. It's a surefire way to turn them into zombies.

Video Game Induced Coma