Office Gourmet: Where Work Hours are Meal Hours

At the Office of Unconventional Culinary Delights, we don't just eat to live, we live to eat. Our chefs, all of whom are secretly professional cage fighters, have crafted a menu that will make you question the very fabric of sanity.

-- The infamous "Ink Blot Soup" - a hearty mix of squid ink, activated charcoal, and a hint of existential dread. ($12.99)

-- "The Boss's Special": a delicate balance of stale coffee, used motor oil, and disappointment. ($15.99)

-- For the adventurous: "The Meeting That Never Ended" - a never-ending loop of PowerPoint presentations, stale air, and the faint scent of desperation. ($29.99)

Read about our infamous 'Ink Blot Soup' here Learn about the 'Boss's Special' from the chef himself

Don't forget to try our limited-time offer: "The Water Cooler's Revenge" - a refreshing mix of stale water and regret. ($5.99)

Open daily from 9 to 5, except on Fridays, when we're open from 10 to 6. Because weekends are for brunch.