"I was a struggling artist until the Lobbyist Application saved my life. It's like they said, 'Hey, you want a job? Here's a job! And it's not even a real job, so you can just do it in your pajamas!'" - John Doe
"I was a politician until I saw the light. The Lobbyist Application showed me that there's more to life than just making promises you can't keep. Now I'm a full-time influencer!" - Mary Jane
"The Lobbyist Application is not just an app, it's a lifestyle. I'm a full-time lobbyist for a living, breathing, sentient piece of furniture. Don't ask me how, just trust me, it's a long story..." - Lobby Stool