By order of the Absurd Overlords, all users are hereby required to read this mandate on a 14-inch CRT monitor.

The following are the terms of the Mandate:

Section 1: All users must wear plaid pants while browsing the site.

Section 2: All users must use at least 3.5 GB of RAM to access the site.

Section 3: All users must have a minimum of 2 hours of free time to waste on the site.

Section 4: All users must be willing to surrender their firstborn child to the Overlords if they wish to access the site's secret features.

Failure to comply will result in penalties, including but not limited to:

- Randomized font sizes and colors

- Mandatory listening to elevator music on repeat

- Forced watching of cat videos

- Randomized keyboard layout

View Terms and Conditions View Frequently Asked Questions