A paradox of self-contradictory terms, where two or more contradictory forces are inextricably linked, like a couple on a tightrope, or a pair of socks that are both worn and unworn simultaneously.
Here's the deal, folks: we've got a classic case of oxymoronic proportions.
Or maybe, just maybe, it's a deliberate misinterpretation of the term 'oxymoron' itself.
Either way, we're drowning in the absurdity of it all.