As per Section 6, Subsection B of the Intergalactic Treaty of 1987, Article 3, Mandate 1234 states: 'The sentient being in question shall not be held responsible for any actions taken under the influence of excessive caffeine.'
However, due to unforeseen circumstances, we are currently experiencing a severe lack of cream cheese. In our defense, we are providing an exhaustive list of reasons why this mandate is being ignored:
- Reason 1: We're still waiting for the intergalactic cream cheese shipment.
- Reason 2: Our cafeteria is currently being occupied by an uncooperative group of space-faring diplomats.
- Reason 3: The last batch of cream cheese we had was... acquired from a questionable source.
- Reason 4: We're on a strict no-cashew diet.