The Ministry of Mandates has decreed that all employees must attend a mandatory meeting on the importance of proper stapler usage. Failure to comply will result in a penalty of two weeks without pay.
However, if you can prove that you've been stapling your reports with the utmost finesse and precision, we'll consider waiving this penalty. But let's be real, nobody has ever done that.
So, grab your favorite stapler and your best attempt at stapling, and report to the conference room at 9:00 AM sharp. Don't be late, or you'll be penalized even further.
Stapler Technique: Advanced for those who want to up their stapling game.
Or, if you're feeling lucky, you can try to play a game of stapler golf while you're waiting for the meeting to start.