Fees, Fees, Everywhere, And Now, In Here!
As per Mandate 9, Section 7, Article 3, Sub-Section B, all visitors are required to pay homage to our benevolent overlords in the form of a small, insignificant fee. This fee is not optional, nor is it negotiable. It is simply a matter of fact, like the sky being blue or the inevitability of taxes.
Penalties for Non-Compliance
Failure to pay the fee will result in the following:
- A sternly-worded letter from our lawyers, reminding you of your obligations and threatening to send their interns after you.
- A visit from our highly trained, ninja-like collection agency.
- A 50/50 chance of being forced to watch an endless loop of our company's annual holiday party videos.
So, please, do the right thing and pay your fee and avoid the consequences.