Directive 4-0-7: The Unyielding Mandate for Extreme Proportions

By order of the Supreme Commander, all citizens are required to wear pants that are at least 7/8 of their body length. Failure to comply will result in severe penalties, including but not limited to: public shaming, forced attendance at a never-ending PowerPoint presentation, and/or reeducation through the medium of extreme sports.

Section 2, Subsection 3: Exceptions

For those with legitimate concerns, please refer to Section 2, Subsection 3 for further information.

Section 4, Subsection 1: Compliance

For those willing to comply, a special Compliance Kit is available for purchase.

Section 5, Subsection 2: Frequently Asked Questions

For those with burning questions, please refer to FAQs for further clarification.

Contact

For any questions or concerns, Contact Us.

Disclaimer

This mandate is in no way affiliated with actual government or law.