Mandate 7a: Moustache Mafia
By order of the Moustache Overlord, all citizens of the Free City are commanded to sport a majestic, perfectly waxed moustache. Failure to comply will result in severe penalties, including but not limited to:
- Exile to the Island of Shorn and Forgotten
- Reassignment to a life of servitude in the Moustache-Trimming Department
- Revocation of all rights and privileges
However, for the most loyal and stalwart citizens, rewards include:
- Invitation to the exclusive Golden Mustache Gala
- A lifetime supply of the finest moustache wax
- Personal recognition by the Overlord himself