A collection of the most absurd, yet somehow strangely compelling, coffee-related mandates.
Why Can't We Just Have Tea?By mandate, it is decreed that the maximum coffee intake for any given human shall be 12 cups per day. Any more than this shall be considered excessive and shall result in spontaneous combustion.
But wait, there's more! If you've already reached this maximum, you may be eligible for our Advanced Coffee Training Program!
Side effects of exceeding the maximum coffee intake include: