When you're at a coffee shop, but can't see the menu, just close your eyes and point at a random button. 9 times out of 10 you'll get a decent cup.
Hyperlinks: Read more about the Science behind Eye-Ordering.
When the barista asks if you want whipped cream, just say no, and pretend you're allergic to dairy. They'll either be impressed by your dedication or confused.
Hyperlinks: Learn more about the art of fake allergies.
Contact mandate4.sub6@neobrutalist.com to submit your own mandate or ask for a tour of the coffee shop of horrors.