MANDATE OF THE MONTH: Whistle Along

By order of the Supreme Leader, all citizens are required to participate in mandatory whistling sessions every Thursday. These sessions, known as "Whistle Alongs," are crucial for maintaining public order and morale. Failure to comply will result in... unpleasant consequences.

Side effects of Whistle Alongs may include but are not limited to:

• Excessive salivation
• Temporary vocal cord strain
• Uncontrollable urges to sing along

To report any side effects, visit our Whistle Along Support Hotline: /whistle-along-support-hotline

Whistle Along Schedule:

• Every 4th Thursday, 3:00 AM
• Repeats every month, ad infinitum

Whistle Along Etiquette:

When whistling, remember to keep your mouth open and your arms relaxed. Do not whistle with your eyes closed. Avoid whistling during sensitive moments (e.g., when the Supreme Leader is nearby).