Q: What is a primary mandate?
A: It's a thing that exists solely to confuse bureaucrats.
Q: How do I obtain a primary mandate?
A: Ha! You think it's that easy? You must first navigate the 12-page application form in triplicate, then wait 6-8 weeks for approval, and finally pay a $50 processing fee.
Q: Can I use my primary mandate for anything?
A: Oh, no. It's only good for ordering takeout, getting into line at the DMV, and attending mandatory Monday morning meetings.
Check the status of your very own primary mandate Frequently asked questions about primary mandatesDisclaimer: Primary mandates are not actually a thing. But don't fact-check, it's more fun this way.