Let's face it, you're a mess. Your life's a disaster movie. But fear not, because we have the solution: Behavioral Therapy for the Disaffected!
Our patented, revolutionary approach will teach you to be a functioning member of society without actually having to try.
We know, we know, you're a special snowflake. But our experts have carefully crafted a series of exercises to help you channel your unique brand of crazy into a productive force for good.
Or, you know, just blame it on your parents.