Congratulations, EGO-awards! You've come a close second to the most important person in the room: yourself.
Withประก a whopping 4.5 self-esteem points, you've managed to convince everyone within a 5-foot radius that you're a real person with a functioning ego.
We're not sure what you did differently, but somehow, you made the toaster in the break room talk prophets of doom about your greatness. That's a skill.
Runner-up 2 of 3 in this category, because let's be real, there's only three people in this entire building, and two of them are in therapy.