Our Great Works

Queen Beth's Evil Laundry List

A List of Unapologetically Terrible Ideas

By Queen Beth, Ruler of the Dark Kingdom of Dirty Socks

  • Steal all the world's supply of decent coffee
  • Replace all public toilets with giant, spinning hamsters
  • Force everyone to watch an endless loop of cat videos
  • Make pineapple pizza a national law
  • Hold a weekly "Guess Who's Socks Are Smelliest" contest
  • Mandate the use of Comic Sans for all official documents
  • Replace all street signs with cryptic, hieroglyphic messages
  • Hold a national holiday for the worship of the almighty Chipotle

And many, many more.