Early Bird Society: Sunrise Schedule

Good morning, sleepyheads!

Today's Schedule:

• 6:00 AM - Caffeine Infusion Protocol (CIP) initiation
• 6:30 AM - Morning stretches and awkwardly trying to get out of bed
• 7:00 AM - Cereal and milk intake (with a side of regret)
• 8:00 AM - Early Bird Society's Daily Briefing (where we discuss the meaning of life, the universe, and why we're so grumpy)
• 9:00 AM - Commute to work, where we'll pretend to be awake
• 12:00 PM - Lunch break, where we'll eat a sandwich while contemplating our mortality
• 3:00 PM - Afternoon slump (where we'll take a nap, but not really)
• 6:00 PM - Dinner time (where we'll pretend to be hungry)

Don't forget to attend our Members Only Social for an evening of witty banter and forced camaraderie!

And, of course, don't miss the Annual Solstice Celebration, where we'll pretend to be festive while secretly counting down the minutes until we can go back to bed!