Therapist's Billing Page
Welcome to my therapist's billing page, where the bills are as thick as the walls of my ego.
Current Session Rates:
- Initial Consultation: $200 (includes one free hug)
- Regular Session: $100 (plus one free cookie)
- Couples Session: $300 (includes one free wine and cheese basket)
- Emergency Session (aka "I've been having a bad day"): $500 (includes one free ice cream sundae)
Payment Options:
- Cash (in person, please)
- Check (make it out to "McSourcious, Therapist Extraordinaire")
- Credit Card (don't even think about it, just swipe)
Special Offers:
- Refer a friend and get 10% off your next session (friend must be as messed up as you are)
- Sign up for our "Therapist's Survival Kit" package and get a free bottle of hand sanitizer (includes one free use)
- Buy 10 sessions, get 1 free (just kidding, that's not really a thing, but wouldn't that be nice)
© 2023 McSourcious, Therapist Extraordinaire
Want to see your bill in detail? Click here
Need to schedule a session? Click here
Want to give me a gift? Click here
Want to report me to the authorities for practicing unlicensed therapy? Click here