Therapist's Billing Page

Welcome to my therapist's billing page, where the bills are as thick as the walls of my ego.

Current Session Rates:

• Initial Consultation: $200 (includes one free hug)
• Regular Session: $100 (plus one free cookie)
• Couples Session: $300 (includes one free wine and cheese basket)
• Emergency Session (aka "I've been having a bad day"): $500 (includes one free ice cream sundae)

Payment Options:

• Cash (in person, please)
• Check (make it out to "McSourcious, Therapist Extraordinaire")
• Credit Card (don't even think about it, just swipe)

Special Offers:

• Refer a friend and get 10% off your next session (friend must be as messed up as you are)
• Sign up for our "Therapist's Survival Kit" package and get a free bottle of hand sanitizer (includes one free use)
• Buy 10 sessions, get 1 free (just kidding, that's not really a thing, but wouldn't that be nice)

© 2023 McSourcious, Therapist Extraordinaire

Want to see your bill in detail? Click here

Need to schedule a session? Click here

Want to give me a gift? Click here

Want to report me to the authorities for practicing unlicensed therapy? Click here