Parallel Pilates: The Antithesis of Inner Peace

Are you tired of traditional meditation practices that only bring you inner peace? Well, we've got news for you: Parallel Pilates is here, and it's the opposite!

With Parallel Pilates, you'll find yourself in a state of constant mental fidgeting, as you try to focus on your breathing while simultaneously counting the number of pixels on the screen.

Our patented (not really) method involves lying on a mat, staring at a wall, and wondering if the wall is actually a portal to another dimension.

Benefits of Parallel Pilates:

Try it today and find the opposite of inner peace!

Return to Inner Peace (if you can handle it)