Implementation Plan:
Our team of experts has devised a 3-phase plan:
- Phase 1: Send a strongly worded letter to the universe.
- Phase 2: Engage in a series of increasingly aggressive diplomatic talks.
- Phase 3: Deploy the Doomsday Device.
Side effects of the destruction of the planet may include:
- Global extinction.
- Uncontrollable sobbing.
- Unending existential dread.