Brewing License Conditions
In the interests of protecting your delicate quantum consciousness, we require that all customers agree to our absurdly comprehensive license conditions:
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You agree to not use our coffee to communicate with parallel universes without our express permission.
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You understand that consuming our coffee while watching cat videos will increase the risk of quantum entanglement.
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You acknowledge that our coffee may cause spontaneous sentience in certain individuals.
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You agree to not use our coffee to power your time machine, unless you're a licensed temporal agent.
By signing below, you acknowledge that you have read and understood these license conditions, and that you're probably going to break them anyway.